having a baby with a woman you don't love

Having children is not cheap. This educational content is not medical or diagnostic advice. AND THE END OF THE DAY IS ALSO HERS. most times the child bears all the burnt of this relationship as the child would be looked upon as some sort of curse to both parties life the father will hate the child instead of loving it and the mother will eventual resent her child. We respect everyones right to express their thoughts and opinions as long as they remain respectful of other community members, and meet What to Expects Terms of Use. The best alterantive is if you can be amicable and stay friends w/your child's mother and cooperate for the kid's sake, although w/the emotions involved that isn't always possible. Remember, the decision you make will decide whether you will be happy or not in the near future. If it gets closer to your due date though, and you feel like nothing's changed, I do think it'd be a good idea to consider adoption. It's the kind of care for your emotions, feelings, and love. we ended u divorcing in 6 years anyway. back out now, "Leaving a pregnant girlfriend with your child, in my view is very selfish and irresponsible. If she says she doesn't want the relationship then that's fine but if a man says he doesn't then that's selfish. As such, you'll need to spend time with both his child's mom and his child. To cut a long story short I'm in a very My Pregnant Girlfriend is Pushing Me Away. SEE THEM EVERYDAY. THE TRUTH IS THAT NO MATTER LOVE CANNOT BE FORCED. After a little while, if you still feel the same (i.e. This discussion is archived and locked for posting. You don't even love him. :(. Time passed and we just got comfortable being there. It was important to me that my children had as normal upbringing as possible. I feel like I'm forcing myself to love her. you are 18 or older, you read and agreed to the. NOW WHY IS IT THAT SO MANY OF US HAD MESSED UP CHILDHOOD? The Preferential Parent. And both of you surely need to stay in touch. I know that my kids love us both. Everything that we do, we have to bear all consequences. My girlfriend admitted to me that she cheated. And you will also need to take a firm decision on what you think is best to be done. Single. There are more than likely services in your area to help you get on your feet (welfare,food stamps,shelter). The issue is she is healthcare prof and works in OBS/GYN so there is no way way she would have an abortion, she has just been involved in too many such procedures and its just not for her. And if you guys were just friends with benefits, why continue the pregnancy? Romantic relationship of beautiful couple. I was not in love with the guy I got pregnant by. She was expressing her feelings and thoughts about feeling like she won't love her child which she should probably talk to her doctor or a therapist about since I'm pretty sure there is a form of depression you can have before having the child but can't think of the name of it off the top of my head. You do make a lot of sense and i guess this is the only way forward. The problem I have now is that have a beautiful baby girl with one girl I impregnated whom I dont love. He is a grown up. The dilemma I have a female colleague who has, over the past three years, told me she loves me and would like to marry me.The problem is that I do not love her and I have told her that. I just need to vent and I thought this would be a good place to do it. What are the reasons for not wanting to be with her? Wasn't looking for a sugar daddy. 2) Are you prepared to forego this child and create a loving family with someone you truly love (which means you will wait for this new love to bear you a child).but be completely guilty all your life to abandon your first newborn just because you dont love your girlfriend. Trust me dude, do whatever you have to to end this A.S.A.P. After having a baby, a woman will be, on average, 2.5 to 5 lbs. Hey I know exactly how you feel. My pregnant girlfriend doesnt seem to want me around. 'Don't expect rewards in love': woman, 32, who desperately wants a baby says she dated 100 men in a year, renewing marriage pressure debate in China A woman went on more than 100 dates. I had been seeing the guy (now DH) exclusively since August of 2011. It happens almost all the time that children involved in such situations rather suffer the consequencies. Don't create a situation where you are stuck and can be controlled like that. It is helped by a rush of love when the baby arrives, but that doesn't have to be present to create a positive, warm, loving connection which is what love is." For me, even weeks later, those warm . It's like I've been sleepwalking all this timeI apologize for my rumbling, i really needed to get this off my chest. Sure, most couples are madly "in love" at first, but as time goes on I think most people who have been married 10, 20, 50+ years will say that love is first a choice and then feelings follow and there are some hard times when the feelings are not there and all you are left with is the choice to show love to this person. His family is great also. She may have decided against an abortion thinking you will still be with her, but if not, TELL HER it is over and you will not be involved with her anymore (except of course whatever involvement you ahve with the child, support and custody-wise). Right? the most helpful and trustworthy pregnancy and parenting information. That's what we tackle in today's blog. The man I am pregnant by has been in my life for years and is a good man but I am not in love with him. I want to leave my 4 months pregnant girlfriend !! Have you told him you're pregnant yet? Please, please do not have an abortion like somebody commented. 1. Create an account or log in to participate. A Group Leader is a What to Expect community member who has been selected by our staff to help maintain a positive, supportive tone within a group. Support yourself. or you will be 35 and wondering where your life went and if you'll ever be happy. Purposely avoiding sex is a great time to have your own awakening Not having sex can be a. I've been in one relationship like it and told myself I wouldn't be in one again. As a matter of fact, there are many mental, emotional, and social side effects associated with being a young-faced woman. 9 min read. Privacy Policy. He shdnt forget the welfare of the child involved. Aside from personal decision to have an unwanted relationship and questioning such question of having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it, we will need to be responsible. Moreland told me, "Some moms have that immediate, overwhelming, love-at-first-sight feeling with their newborns; others don't. And that's okay. Welcome to the world little one! I know daddies who didn't feel a connection to their babies until they held them for the first time and like someone else said, maybe that'll be the case for you. I'm having a baby with someone I'm not in love with. not the father, mother or child. Copyright 2017 - 2022 by LoveDevani.com. There are midnight feedings, changing diapers, rocking a screaming infant and little sleep. It may be tolerable now, but it sounds like you are unhappy. It is tough to find time for yourself, let alone your spouse. If you don't love her then don't be with her. On the contrary, women have been forced to marry men they didn't love for centuries. Would I do it again? NOW YOU WONT BE ALWAYS PHYSICALLY THERE, BUT BECUASE YOU ARE A HAPPY PERSON THAT WILL TRANSLATE THAT. So today at my apt (weekly NST/ ultrasound due to Covid protocol) baby girl measured 8lb 2 ounces and short so they are saying she will be a big baby and have a big headI had my cervix checked and Im not dilated any nor has 35 weeks - desperate to getto finish line ?? Women are doing everything they can to get contraception. Only knowing that you don't feel good with your current situation won't make any change unless you do. When we found out this baby is a boy, the feeling of disconnection multiplied; I know this baby is going to be like his daddy. Women, in particular, have a growing awareness of the benefits of having babies when they're ready and not having more than they can provide for. I'm curious as to how he is selfish?? Your post will be hidden and deleted by moderators. Broken heart is a usual thing but, what is bad is the action that people choose to take to heal the broken heart itself. Mary Morris Former Bookkeeper Author has 285 answers and 1.6M answer views 2 y It wasn't ideal but eventually I got a better job and bought myself a nice car. Long story as short as possible! Most were married to . In the episode, Homer recounts the story of Maggie's birth when the kids ask why there are no photos of her in the family album. Learn more about, Realizing I Had PPD After Returning to Work as a Soldier in the U.S. Army, Planned c section too presumptuous??? i know for sure u dated her for longer b4 she got pregnant start looking at the quality this gal have n think of ur daughter after that give her a chance n delete that mind of not loving her out of ur mind n married her ..am sure God will give u new hrt to love her.. FTM. There are reasons you should know and love yourself before you love someone else that will remind you to be true to yourself. U r runnin away from marriage cos u didn love her b4 ?? After all, a 70-year-old guy can still have kids. You will need to end an unwanted relationship. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think. We are deciding if we should divorce now or later when she is bigger. Just not with her. Rejecting your man's baby mama is almost the same as rejecting your boyfriend's child and you don't want to do that. Best wishes for a lifetime of happiness. If you'd like to talk more you could Facebook message me my names Logan Downey this is my profile pic but in rainbow. That's when one of them dropped the term . On the other hand, if you do not love her but only want the child, it is also very selfish of you. Don't try to be super-parent and don't let other people's unfair assumptions affect how you see yourself and your family. We strive to provide you with a high quality community experience. Some men can be very guarded and closed when it comes to expressing how they feel - it can almost feel like they are pulling away from you and leaves you wondering whether he's actually into you. I too feel torn by a similar situation. When I did he the. Second thing that you can do after having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it is to be responsible. What was even worst she call me two days later to ask me if I could pick her up and I did. And the same with me. But, then again, falling in love is always phenomenal and terrifying. Sounds like you have a lot on your plate with a baby due in July. Ex gf keeps driving past my house!!? Apparently that first year of raising the child is very stressful, specifically on the relationship. Group Black's collective includes Essence, The Shade Room and Naturally Curly. It's not that they don't want to. you have a baby with a girl you dont love,but you loved her apple enough to eat it without any protection?stupid talk,absolute rubbish. She needs someone that truly loves her. It is normal to want to lay your head on your mother's breast and feel the security and warmth of her love and compassion. Damaged. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Get a job and find a place to live. NO PHYSICAL THINGS. We can and should celebrate those things while also giving our love and support to those who are struggling to get there, and to those who don't want any part of that scene, ever. We respect everyones right to express their thoughts and opinions as long as they remain respectful of other community members, and meet What to Expects Terms of Use. Help :(. Love My Boyfriend Wants To Have A Baby With Another Woman By Alex Alexander Written on Dec 23, 2022 Photo: fizkes / Shutterstock When I met my polyamorous boyfriend , Buddy, I couldn't. THIS IS THE ENVIROMENT IN THIS SITUATION. Group Owners uphold the core values of the brand by reporting content that violates the community guidelines. He made a baby with you but doesn't seem to support you financially and you don't live together. In other words, those maternal. Second, if she were to make that decision previously to have an abortion for whatever reason you are not someone whose opinion matters since you're on an Internet forum and you don't know the personal lives of anyone on here enough to dictate that they should never have an abortion. Are these issues still there? That is exactly how I feel about my life over the past 8 years - it feels like I have been sleepwalking.

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having a baby with a woman you don't love